Of Awesome MOs

*Large clock behind ward counter reads 0945 P.M.*

MO on-call: *sees clock then stares daggers at us two taggers* Eh, what are you all doing here? Faster go home la!

Me: Dr, cannot punch out yet, still not 10 pm...

MO: You walk slow-slow, by the time you reach the machine it's 10 pm already. Faster go go!

*10 minutes later we're still behind the counter doing stuff*

MO: EY! I already told you to go home what are you all still doing here?! Go home la!

Did I mention this is the third consecutive time this week that the MO on call told us (nay, shooed us is more precise) to go home on time? And each day is a different MO.

This department is so awesome I think I'm getting manjalitis.

"Doctor posting yang berapa ni?"

Sister: Doctor, posting yang keberapa ni?

Me: Posting first, Sister~

Sister: Ye ke? Laa, saya ingatkan dah berapa. Cara Doctor macam bukan first poster~

That simple remark just made my day.

And possibly my entire week.

Never underestimate kindness. Such an off-hand remark from a friendly ward sister and it was enough to make my heart bloom again; made me treat patients with a bigger smile on my face... 

The impact is astounding.

Also the 'Thank you, Dr!'s I got from patients and their parents. Today was filled with it- even though I only took care of the ward for two days. One even personally shook my hand and thanked me for the care I gave to her son.

Just... Amazing.

And to think just a few hours prior to that, I felt useless and felt I had no role in anything.

Today is one of those days that remind you of how rewarding this career is.

This kind of day is not guaranteed to happen every day.

I left my house crying today. For the first time since tagging, I really cried and wished I could quit. I considered taking emergency leave for my sanity. But someone saw me through it, and made me drag my butt to the hospital. For a while, the only thought in my head was "I should stop being selfish- there are people who need me."

And it was one of the greatest days I've had in a hospital.

There is no guarantee of what to expect.

Each brand new day is an opportunity for you to experience life's greatest pleasures, even in the most dire of times.

Believe in the silver lining. Believe that no good deed goes unrewarded, and that no bad deed goes unpunished. Just believe.

I don't intend to make this post braggy; I'm sorry if it sounds that way.

But it was an amazing day, and I know there will be more days like today- just like there will be more days like yesterday. But until and unless you wake up and bring yourself to greet the day, you'll never know what you'll miss!

And don't get me wrong, busy is busy. But there are types of busy that are more enjoyable, less hectic, mmkay. HOship is not a cakewalk!

Zzzz

Today, I got burns where my socks met the dorsum of my left foot.

I managed to drink two packets of Milo and eat some bread. That was it.

The food provided went into the trash.

What a shame.

But I know that I have got some good friends and superiors so that's amazing.

Also one of my MOs is super cute. Like, swoon-worthy cute.

Not that that registered in my head for more than a couple of hours before I got super busy and he left the hospital to do what cute MOs do when they're outside the hospital.

Also did I mention I'm getting married soon?

That said, I am now certain I do not want to become a paediatrician.

GUYS.

Buy lots of packet food for tagging period.

If you get hyper on coffee, GET IT. You need that extra energy.

Don't dwell on how horrible one superior makes you feel. Rather, try to put the feelings aside and focus on other things you have to carry out. Believe me, you're not the only one and not everyone else hates you for the same reason. Many people sympathize.

And be a total team player. #1 rule.

Also the occasional cute & kind MO does help a little.

This Posting is Sorta, Kinda Amazing.

Life is so amazing when you have helpful colleagues and superiors.

The hard tasks seem way more bearable.
Honestly. Sometimes I shudder to think of myself in other postings where the superiors aren't as nice. This department's reputation for nice superiors and colleagues and working system really exceeds expectations.

Even in the busiest of times, you do not feel too pressured. Don't get me wrong, the pressure is there. But knowing that your MOs will understand your business and help you with other tasks that are usually way below MO job scopes is a blessing. They do not force you to do rounds at a specific time. They know you're doing your job, and they do their best to help you, too.

When I ask for help or pointers, the worst reaction I can get is a slight remark in my need to study a topic- which rarely happens anyway. Most of the time they are just glad I asked questions pertaining the management of the patients, and explain their actions patiently. When I fail at a certain procedure more than twice, I can ask for their help to do it. Sometimes, I don't even have to ask- they'll just appear and volunteer to do it for me.

What. Even,

I haven't met all of the available MOs and senior HOs in my department, but I'm really happy with the ones I have so far. After tomorrow, though, I will be in a different ward... With different people. I'm kind of scared I'll do worse.

I'm not a super HO or anything, but I can find myself smiling as I do my work. The nurses are becoming friendlier and friendlier by the day. Everyone tries to help others in the ward.

This posting has so far been a great blessing. I was right; I wanted a different department initially, but thought that if I didn't get into that department, then God knows that's for the best, and I should stick to it.

I'm glad I did!

Off Day Thoughts

Yes, this exists even for taggers. But this may depend on the hospital because I have a friend who claims she doesn't get off days during the entire tagging period.

There are busy days, and there are slow (relaxing!) days.

I learned a lot in the past 4 days of tagging in an SCN/NICU:

1. You do not disturb the nurses when they have passovers to conduct, but they can very well disturb you during your am review, pm review and procedures to imply that you're being rather incompetent
2. A lot of nurses are very helpful despite their loudness
3. Your competency during your clinical years in medical school doesn't hold a candle to how your working days will be.
4. Remember when you were surprised at how messy and unorganized and incomplete the histories are for patients in the BHTs you read? YOU WILL DO IT TOO because you're simply pressed for time!
5. The success for blood-taking is 70% in your head, 30% skill. 40% what you learn from your senior HOs.
6. Your MOs are a blessing when they cover for you while the specialist asks questions you do not know the answer to. And these MOs may appear to be the stricter ones
7. My MOs are so good at blood-taking, they must have x-ray vision, but not limited to visualizing bones and soft tissues only.
8. It's actually easier to take blood from a neonate than a child, or even a grown-up... Most of the time
9. The useless feeling I get when I fail at blood-taking but my seniors do it in one simple go-
10. The helplessness I feel when the MO says something like 'Take blood C&S', 'TSB level QID', 'Prolonged jaundice workup' and 'Start IV C-Pen and Genta for this patient' because it means poking the babies!
11. Other than during a procedure, one of the worst moments in a day is when you have to wake up and get prepared to go to the hospital for another brand new day.
12. But when your patient recovers, you feel super happy
13. And when they come back after being discharged, you wonder if it's in any way your fault
14. Tedious things like writing discharge summaries take up time!
15. Learning to ignore negative reactions to you will be your best shield when your knowledge and competency is not up to par yet. And keep on trying and practicing because it will contribute to your future.
16. During tagging, you are expected to be functional- but your mistakes will be forgiven, especially when you're a first poster.

Et cetera.

But this is my first off day after a series of actual working days.

So I'm gonna rest and not think about hospital life too much.

And just FYI, I'm not exactly miserable during tagging periods. Sometimes it's actually really fun and makes me feel like dragging my butt off my bed in the morning was totally worth it. When it's totally horrible and suddenly the entire ward is in chaos, I reserve some of my thoughts to some of my favourite things, ala The Sound of Music. And always remember that the storm will pass, and there are people who can help me no matter how dire the situation feels at that moment.

Like now, I am just chilling in bed. The storm has passed.

Until tomorrow comes.

Then I won't be chilling anymore. But it's okay, chill days will come and experiences occur. And good deeds will never go to waste. :)

Kay bye need to do more chilling!

Early Morning Rant

Suddenly I'm so tired and feel like not going to the hospital.

The thought that keeps me from just breaking down with exhaustion is the fact that

1. It's not as exhausting as some other people's postings
2. I have great colleagues and superiors so far
3. I still have time to eat so why am I complaining and
4. The patients.


T____T

I'm telling you, there is no way I'm letting my children take up medicine. It's rewarding, truth be told. But sometimes it's more frustrating and tiring than rewarding.

Okay enough chit-chat must go.

Tagging

D2oL tagger here.

My feet are sore all the time.

But how can I complain when meals (breakfast, lunch, tea, and dinner) are provided for us?
Hehe.